The Psychology Degree I Couldn't Use

I studied psychology in the United States. Somehow I had this little feeling inside of me that said it would be difficult to use this degree in Germany. After immigrating here, I made a decision: if I were to make it in this country, I had to give it a real chance.

A real chance meant taking German courses five days a week, five hours a day, for almost a whole year. Not because I'm particularly talented with languages, but because I understood something fundamental: the only way to remotely understand people in another country is to speak their language and try to understand their mentality. There are so many subtleties when it comes to language and the mentality of people.

I passed the German language exam that would allow me to study in German. The university system accepted only half of my degree's credits. I was 28, almost 29 years old. Did I really have it in me to start all over again?

The Cold Reality of German Academia

I attended a couple of classes at the university and came to several realizations. The US emphasizes social sciences in a way that's fun and engaging—there's interaction between classmates and teachers. Everything in Germany was so dry, so coldly scientific.

I was also intimidated by doing a psychology degree in German. Getting a degree in another language is no joke. The technical terminology alone would have buried me.

So there I was: an immigrant with half a psychology degree, decent German, and no clear path forward.

The Betrayal That Changed Everything

Remember that Hamburg tea broker I mentioned learning from twenty-one years ago? He's the same person who offered me an apprenticeship in Hamburg. This is the reason my wife and I moved to Hamburg. He was a friend. He was someone I could trust.

We moved here and assumed everything would go as planned. I never signed any paperwork.

After having been in Hamburg for some months, this tea broker businessman invited me to dinner. Why not, right? Everything was going as planned! My wife and I were in this lovely, green, friendly city of Hamburg.

I was shocked, stunned, angry, sad, and confused. I experienced an array of every possible feeling. How could you offer me an apprenticeship, have me move myself and my wife to a new city, and then just pull the offer like that?

Looking back, it was the best thing that could have ever happened to me, but it still brings up feelings of anger and spite. If you give your word, you should be held accountable.

Discovering My Gift at 30-Something

Now, here I was, working for a café and roastery, thirty-something years old, trying to make a life for myself to help give me, my wife, and my future kids a good life.

Through my years working at Harney & Sons Fine Teas and various cafés and roasteries in New York, I finally came to a realization: I have a gift. My gift is simply the gift of gab—the gift of being able to connect with humans.

Why should I be employed by someone when I could do it just as well as they could, if not better? Beyond being good at connecting with people, I finally started accepting and realizing that despite my chaotic nature, I am analytical and have strong ideas and concepts.

Saving €10,000 on a Café Salary

I finally made the decision to open my own café. I didn't know how. But I knew that I would have to do it. I had to do it for myself. It pained me to even consider working for someone else for the rest of my life, knowing that I could have given myself the chance to not only be my own boss but to own my own business and determine how I work.

I wanted to take accountability and make sure I really gave it my all to make this dream a reality.

I had no money. I had one job. I saved more than half of my income every month for two years. By the end of that time, I had €10,000.

While saving, I became friends with two bankers who were regular customers at the café where I was working. I met them often for guidance. I would go home, work on the points that needed refinement, and continue developing my concept.

The Impossible Catch-22 of German Business Loans

At a certain point, they told me with confidence that this concept would work and I could have my fair share of success. But them giving me a loan would be completely dependent on finding a location.

Here's how German business financing works: There's usually your house bank that gives you the green light, but then there's a larger bank that provides 80 percent of the amount you're looking for. You need to get approval from them.

The Catch-22

• To get a meeting with the larger bank, you need a location
• To get a location, you need a long-term rental contract
• To sign a contract, you need to commit before having any bank agreement

This is a huge risk. I signed a 12-year lease before getting any sort of agreement from the bank. If you don't have a contract, they won't give you a chance to pitch your idea.

The Meeting That Changed My Life

I remember the night before the most important meeting of my life. I was talking to my mom about where I was at in establishing my business. She reminds me to this day how confident I was.

I told her, "Hey Mom, heading over to the big meeting and I'm feeling good. I'm putting on my suit, heading over there with a water boiler and coffee. I'll make her a filter coffee and then talk to her about why my concept will work out."

My mom could only laugh. I felt so sure and confident, although it was a huge risk to sign such a long lease. I knew that this would be the only way for me to get a chance at the bank loaning me €100,000.

She asked me how I could be so sure that this café would work out when there were so many other cafés in the area.

I told her that there are no cafés specializing in both coffee and tea. And there are no cafés with my American flair and charisma. It's inevitable that my café would be incredibly successful.

She felt my joy, passion, charisma, and conviction. The rest is history.

From Dishwasher to... Dishwasher

The loan went through. I got my chance to tell my story of going from a dishwasher to a millionaire.

But it never panned out that way, and that's okay.

I enjoy being a dishwasher—doing it my way.

What I Learned About Taking Risks in Germany

1. Credentials Don't Always Transfer

My American psychology degree was worth half its value in Germany. Your qualifications from home may not carry the same weight here.

2. Language Is Non-Negotiable

Five hours a day, five days a week for nearly a year. That's what integration actually costs. Not just understanding words, but understanding mentality, humor, and cultural context.

3. Verbal Promises Mean Nothing

Get everything in writing. Always. I learned this the hard way when my apprenticeship offer disappeared over dinner.

4. German Banking Requires Insane Faith

You have to sign a 12-year lease before you have funding. You have to risk everything before anyone will bet on you.

5. Charisma Still Matters

I showed up to a bank meeting with a water boiler and made coffee for the loan officer. That human connection—showing rather than just telling—made the difference.

6. The American Dream Works Differently Here

In America, we talk about going from dishwasher to millionaire. In Germany, success looks more like going from dishwasher to dishwasher—but being your own boss, doing it your way, and building something sustainable rather than explosive.

Why I'm Telling You This

Every week, someone comes into Lowinsky's and tells me they want to open their own café or shop. They romanticize it. They imagine the Instagram moments and the creative freedom.

I don't discourage them, but I do tell them the truth: You'll work harder than you ever have. You'll risk more than feels comfortable. You'll have moments of doubt, anger, and exhaustion.

But if you have a genuine gift for what you do—if you can connect with people, if you believe in your concept, if you're willing to show up every single day and literally make the coffee yourself when needed—then it's worth it.

Not because you'll become a millionaire. Because you'll become yourself.